


Every little thing that should've been said

by Lovestory81



Category: The 100 (TV), The 100 Series - Kass Morgan
Genre: 701, Bellamy reading the Iliad, F/M, Love Confession, Oneshot, Romantic Fluff, Some time together, The Bellarke-talk we miss, The heart opens up
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-29
Updated: 2020-02-29
Packaged: 2021-02-28 04:34:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,081
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22957996
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lovestory81/pseuds/Lovestory81
Summary: Bellamy's in bed in his room, reading the Iliad. Of course Clarke needs to check on him, how he's doing, after everything that's happened...and loosing his sister on top of all that.This ONESHOT portrays the kinda closed Bellamy as we know him. But one little photograph inside the book, plus this precious time with his soulmate changes him, it's time, time to open up.
Relationships: Bellamy Blake/Clarke Griffin
Comments: 2
Kudos: 56





	Every little thing that should've been said

The door suddenly opened in a rush and Clarke stormed in, surprised to see such a calm Bellamy lying on his bed, halfway up, his nose in the book he was reading...

“Bellamy...” she froze, a surprised smile on her face.

He hadn't heard her and jumped up and moaned, murmuring something while he put down the book on the nightstand.

“Who else you thought you would find here?” he struggled a bit to sit up straight and messed up his hair after.

The sound of his voice told her a million things, a pale face, red eyes gazing at her, his whole appearance gave away his grief. And still, he fought against it, acting as if nothing had happened. The heart, who wasn't really the heart anymore. Tired eyes searching her face, while he had so many hidden emotions inside of him. Bellamy looked like he could burst out in tears at any moment...

“You ok?” he asked as she just stood there, her brows slowly forming a frown, reading him.

Clarke jumped up from her thoughts and worries, responding with a high voice...

“Me?” she was kinda shocked.

He raised an eyebrow “I don't see anyone else here?”

Without hesitation she suddenly hurried to the bed and threw herself into his arms and moaned when their chests touched, his heart was racing as he clamped onto her immediately, like Clarke knew in a natural way that he needed this so much.

Clarke was also different lately, no more 'love is weakness', it was far beyond that now.

"I'm so glad you're back...I heard what happened and I- I was so worried Bellamy...”

There wasn't one thought on her mind that kept her from hiding her love for him anymore. Like he'd awoken something inside of her, during CPR.

But instead of talking about what happened in the woods, or what it had done to him, he avoided the subject at first.

As if it wasn't audible in his voice “Well I'm right here. And I'm fine.” he forced a smile on his face.

His depressing attitude effected her, she knew him so well...Automatically she started to play along and quickly wiped away her own tears with her sleeve. Bellamy followed every move, his pupils responding late.

She decided to move away from him to create some space and sat down on the side of the bed.

After one last sniff she asked “So what were you doing?”

Because of her sympathy, his lips curled into a crooked smirk “I'm reading.”

“You're reading, what?” she tried to smile and showed her interest, observing the book-cover, while he took it from the nightstand to show it to her...

”You look more like your mom then you thought?” she asked, her eyes flickering from his eyes to his lips.

Bellamy didn't make eye contact and clenched his yaws, slightly nodding “I guess I do, but I didn't see her read much, she read it to us.” mentioning his sister without saying her name did something inside of him. 

When he wanted to put the book down again, something fell out, it was a small, old photograph...

Like a whirling leaf, it landed on the bed and Clarke picked it up. A cute photo of the Blake siblings when they were young. This must've been a very special secret photo, It was clear why he was reading this book right now.

Without any questions she placed the photo in his hand when he already reached out for it. It stayed quiet while Bellamy put it back where it belonged, not saying a word about it.

“So it's called the Iliad.” he continued as if nothing happened “You wanna hear it?”

It felt special that he wanted to share something dear to him and the change in his voice told her this was helping. “Sure”

After blinking his eyes he invited her to sit closer beside him. “Ok then, come here.”

Clarke frowned and didn't move, did he just- “I'm comfy right here.”

“Come on, let's _chill out_.” he teased, using Josephine's words.

She chuckled and remembered when she'd said that and his reaction...

“What if someone sees us?...” Clarke pointed out, which was weird, because they were always close.

Bellamy frowned “I don't care...” he paused and saw the big question mark rise above her head “Look, I wasn't going to mention it and I really don't wanna talk about it, but I'm single again.”

Clarke interrupted “Single?” like de didn't know the meaning of that word. 

The subtle nod and the expression on his face confirmed it. If he wasn't feeling so depressed he would laugh at her right now. “As in; I'm _available_ again.” he winked, but the sad expression on his face didn't change.

"What are you waiting for?" his hand gestured her to sit beside him “We've been through so much Clarke and we never have time...”  
  


Being close was like second nature to them, especially after he'd saved her life, like they took it to a next level...Surprisingly Bellamy even opened his arm for her and Clarke found a nice warm spot against his side, no space left between them. She rested her head onto his shoulder, ready to listen.

“Perfect” he glanced at her lips “Here we go...” and he opened the book to start reading to her...

_So...speaking he set his child again in the arms of his beloved_ _  
__wife, who took him back again to her fragrant bosom_ _  
__smiling in her tears; and her husband saw, and took pity upon her,_ _  
__and stroked her with his hand, and called her by name and spoke to her:_ _  
__"Poor Andromache! Why does your heart sorrow so much for me?_

The words were pronounced correctly and his deep voice was always pleasant to listen to....You could feel that he read this more then once...

Bellamy stopped for a second and stared at Clarke, who was reading ahead of him because of her curiosity, saying “I never thought there was any romance in these books. This is about Hektor right? I haven't read the books, but I heard about the character...”

His heart warmed as he loved how she picked it up, they never sat down like this before. There simply wasn't enough time for them to chat or do anything like this...

“Hektor, yeah that's right. And you know? He was a great warrior, but also a family man with a deep love for his wife.”

_Why did he have to say that..._

There was this silence...and then he continued reading to her. After a while, he noticed her body got weaker and her breathing became heavier.

“You're not falling asleep are you? Is it that boring?”

Clarke was not asleep, but drowsy and responded with a hoarse voice “Sorry, no I'm still awake. I love it, you're a great reader.” she complimented, a little embarrassed.

Suddenly he remembered how Octavia used to fall asleep when mom kept on reading, because she couldn't get enough of it...And how they put her to bed together. He missed them both so much. It made his eyes burn, because of the upcoming tears and he hoped Clarke would miss it.

But of course she didn't. “I knew it...You can't be 'fine'.”

Bellamy swallowed, aware that she could see right through him and that it was better to give up this inner fight. There was so much to say, the expression on his face changed...Unable to hold the tears.

"Oh, Bellamy..." Clarke immediately embraced him “I am so sorry you lost her.” their cheeks touched as he felt her warm breath on his ear.

They both softly began to cry in each other's arms...

After a while he whispered “We both lost someone very dear to us.”

Clarke deeply sighed in his neck, her nose touching his bare skin as she sobbed, while his fingers followed her hair to the back of her head, slightly massaging her skull to comfort her.

“Sshh it's ok”

But Clarke wanted to be there for him instead and replied with “At least we still have each other.”

Now Bellamy deeply inhaled and spoke softly, from the heart “I wouldn't even know what to do without you.”

She avoided what he said, while it was huge! It was a confession! After all these years...Somehow the sorrow was absorbing them more right now.

She sobbed “I know how much she meant to you...Everything you did to keep her safe...”

Her tears combined with her breathing created a warm spot in his neck. Her whole presence was comforting and calming and Bellamy just couldn't have her close enough. It was exactly what his hands told her, gently pressing on her back, to keep her warm and safe against him.

“Right now you're the only one who seems to give a damn.” he sighed “I just got her back...we talked, but it wasn't enough...” new tears came up and he shivered a bit.

“Bellamy you did everything you could.” her heart stung when she felt his chest began to shake...Hidden grief and sadness, it all came out...

And after a while he opened up even more, it was heartbreaking.

“No...I didn't- I did not keep her safe, I wasn't there for Octavia, just as much as _I wasn't there for_ _ **you**_ _._ ” a tremble in his voice at the last words and then he gasped for air.

Suddenly Bellamy backed away a little and shortly grabbed her upper arms, staring into her eyes...

The sadness in his deep brown eyes gave her chills...Finally, he told her what was really going on inside him “The thing is Clarke- I forgave you. But I never asked you to forgive _**me** _.” his eyes flickered back and forth. “Truth is I'm still the big jerk I was when we just landed on Earth. Scared and selfish.”

A deep sigh through his nose as he pursed his lips, it wasn't easy to open up, but with Clarke he could totally be himself.

And he kept on trying “The lanterns...I was so proud, and impressed at the same time, that you could. You know, talk about what's going on inside and try to fix things.”

Clarke blinked her eyes and soothed with a warm sweet voice “I know” a tiny sympathetic smile appeared on her face “We all process things differently....Hey? It's ok.”

The warm touch of her hand on his beard made him feel safe to open up even more. It was about time he did and though it was hard it also felt good. 

“Clarke-” and after a deep sigh he stammered “Unlike you, I- I couldn't write something down, told ya my lantern wouldn't float...” 

Butterflies filled his stomach as he felt her fingertips caressing his beard. “...because it would be to heavy.”

Their eyes locked as he took her other hand.

“My love...”

Clarke's eyes widened, her heart just skipped a beat.

Bellamy continued “I was so filled with guilt, because- I left you behind to die...And I should have stayed.”

And when Clarke wanted to say something, he responded “Ssshh...don't.” one hand still holding hers, his thumb caressing the palm of her hand. “I never felt this before Clarke, didn't even believe te existence of it.”

Her hand dropped on his leg, she was in awe, Bellamy now took both of her soft, tiny hands in his big hands, safe and warm. A tiny smirk appeared on his face as he glanced down.

Then he looked up, dead serious again "...And I also never experienced this pain in my heart before..I am so sorry that I couldn't keep you safe. My heart broke when we left without you, I thought you were-” Tears welled up in his eyes.

But she did interrupt, to calm him." hey I'm right here. I came through because of you."

Bellamy cried and nodded "You once said; everything I did, was to safe my sister...But that's not true- I didn't do it all for Octavia.” he paused and finally said the three little words:

“I love you” a tear ran down his cheek, he sniffed “God, I love you so much.”

Gently, his hands reached out to her, to cup her face “It's you- it's always you.”

“I love you too” she cried and crawled right back into his arms, Bellamy bend in to kiss her.


End file.
